An update, no pics

So, we went to Fayetteville over the weekend and my sister and I were seriously rocking some Dance Party on Wii. Rob thought this was super funny and got out the camera to record my not so ready to be recorded dancing body dropping it like it was hot. Long story short.....we left the camera next to the Wii. Hmph.

So, I'll just talk your ear off. All about Hot Mess and Sad Clown. Or Rylan and Max, respectively. Rylan is working through some real anger management issues when he is put in time out. Enter the name Hot Mess. Max is growing 4 two year molars all at once. At the ripe old age of barely one. And he KEEPS. GETTING. EAR. INFECTIONS. The nasty ones that clog his ear tube. Enter the name Sad Clown.

But, the glass is always half full. There is always a silver lining. The kids are freakin cute. So cute that by the end of the day, when he's all snuggled in your lap with his favorite book or ten books, Hot Mess returns to Rylan, and then there's the one that looks at you across the room, lights up with realization of who you are and how much he loves you and he opens his mouth and utters "LOLA!!!" And Sad Clown is back to Max.

Rylan, our boy that once scared us because he, literally, STOPPED speaking (around 18-19 months) is now telling stories, bossing us around, and (best of all) telling us what he needs. He has yet to learn that when he asks for stuff, followed by the very cute Rylan word of "puh-weeze" that he almost always gets what he asked for. He's still working through freaking out, screaming and throwing himself on the ground when we don't immediately know what he's wanting. Its a work in progress. It just feels SO GOOD to say that we see progress.

I'll give you some funny Ry-isms

"you not a bad mommy, you an Elmo mommy"-not sure what that means

"My baby brudder is seepin'"

"Lola woke me up"

"Daddy, your tv too loud"

"Hunty Dunty fall down, but he's okay"

"Daddy I broke my crown"***

Max isn't just walking. The kid is running. I only thought I was busy having a newborn and a two year old. Holy moly the kid is fast. Often, and I do mean often, I'll be helping Rylan get his pants pulled up after going potty, and here comes Max and throws a toy in Rylan's pee water. He also can do sign language to tell us he wants "more" of whatever he's eating and he has said -Lola, mama, dada, LOLA, dog, Lola, hat, Lola......he really likes Lola. Alot. So much, in fact, that he is dressing up as her for Halloween.

So, there's an update. I so hope to have a camera back soon. I feel like the worst blogger EVAH!

***Um, because we don't already have shit for luck, when we went to Kansas I fell down wearing some cheapo heels. It didn't hurt too bad, so I didn't really worry about it. Which is why 1.5 weeks later I was going down a flight of concrete stairs with Max in my arms and holding Rylan's hand. My ankle literally quit working and turned perpendicular to my body causing me to fall, causing Rylan to roll down 4-5 stairs and causing Max to go flying through the air. HOWEVER, we did have some luck, as Rylan fell on his side and rolled side to side instead of onto his head. And I fell onto my butt, so I was able to reach out and catch Max's pants, stopping him from sailing through the air, but his head did graze a concrete step. It was seriously sad times.Apparently my ankle didn't hurt because it had sprained so much that all the tendons had stretched completely out. To the point of being unstable. I am in physical therapy for my piece of crap ankle, so hopefully this won't happen again.

Max Is One

I am very sorry this is two weeks late. We've had three parties for Max, taken a trip to Kansas for a wedding, been babysitting another one year old, held a garage sale, had another ear infection, a sprained ankle and pumpkin patched. I woke up today and realized I had thrown our blog out the window. The best thing about all that? KNOCK ON WOOD, they were (mostly) healthy enough that we got to do all of the above things!!!!

Max is one. I cannot believe we are already saying that. If feels like yesterday we just brought him home from the hospital. This last year has been one of the hardest of my life, with all of our illnesses and adapting to two small kids, but it has been my favorite at the same time.

So, let's rewind two weeks. We threw Max a first birthday bash at our house a week before his birthday, because we were traveling to Kansas for a wedding during his actual birthday. Some of his playgroup friends and several family members were able to make it to the house to help us celebrate. We were so lucky to have great weather, so it ended up being a really great day for lots of outside time, chatting and good times. Thanks to everyone who helped us celebrate good times.

The cake for the big Razorback Fans

Sweetest Birthday Boy showing off his present from his Grandma and Grandpa. Our four family unit now has a complete set of rocking chairs.

I haven't a clue whether the kid actually ate ANY cake. But he enjoyed

massaging it into all facial orices.

Maxer's cake. So cute.

Playing with his new bus. The occupants of the bus are hanging out of his mouth. Notice post-cake hair. It was crusty. ewwww

Getting his Toms shoes from Cheryll. She might or might not have noticed how everytime a kid in our playgroup has Toms, I go ON AND ON AND ON about how cute they are.

Max's nursery was decorated with Dr. Seuss, so we got him a huge stack of Dr. Seuss books to enjoy. He isn't really into them quite yet, but Rylan is enjoying the fruits of that labor.

Our sweet bday boy (and me with crazy eyes)

The whole family. This is the best we could do. Lots of distractions.

So, it was a great day, fun was had by all. The very next week, we left for a four day trip to Kansas for my cousin's wedding. More on that later.

Dear Max,

As the book says, we love you to the moon.....and back. You have brought so much happiness and light into our life. I wouldn't trade you for a million of anything. You are one cool dude. A life without our Max in it is not a life I'd like to imagine at all. The world is a better place with you in it and I thank God that he chose Rob and I to be your mom and dad. Keep bringing the cute and I promise I'll do better to document it!!!!

2 more months Rylan, 2 more months

That's how long Rylan has to be all terrible two-ish. I thought it was over. We've had some pretty magical weeks for about a month now. Rylan was amazing everyone with his increased talking, a tiny bit of sharing, playing with toys lots and lots, learning to potty, and helping mommy out with tasks like getting a new diaper for Max and such.

And, I'll tell you. I did this silly thing. I thought we'd been lucky enough to skip certain things. Like hitting. He really hasn't been much of a hitter, very occasional hits and they were more overzealous "I like you and I must touch you a little too strongly" type hits. I also thought he'd skipped the picky eater phase. And I really thought we'd said good-bye to the constant "no's" and I thought we'd cut down the whining considerably.

This last week was a real bitch. And I'm not going to apologize for that swearing. Cause, not only did return of the Two-ness come at us, but this weather change set off both boys' wheezy/coughy crap for airway selves. Cue albuterol induced crazy toddler and baby. By Friday, Rylan had bloody lips, I had a bruised toe and missing hair, Max had a bruised eye and a boo boo on his finger and everyone's nerves were frayed. The carpet had new spots on it, the air conditioner vent fell off and I think I gave myself lock jaw from grinding my teeth when I was stressed. Okay maybe not, but I might have been on my way.

On a bright side, our carpets are professionally cleaned and our cocker, Lola, got groomed. Lola tends to look like Alf when she's ready for a trim, and our carpet was starting to beg for a good wash. Both cleanings should help decrease the allergen level in this house and good moods happen naturally when things look cleaner and your cocker isn't bringing leaves and garden gnomes in matted in her hair.

The other good news is that we had a weekend of restarts and refreshment. I've put together some stuff to help use Rylan's energy for good instead of evil. Good boy charts, preschool packets, and some field trips to help the matter.

Before the crazy albuterol/terrible two induced craziness, we marveled in the decrease in temps and met up with our friends Krystal, Harper and Hayes at the zoo.

So excited to see each other

Harper loves her some Rylan

Really, really loves him

Max checking out the elephants

Our first time on the train

A stop for some lunch. Rylan spilled salt and Harper was teaching him to "clean up"

Massive turtle

A shared moment at the penguin tank

So, there are many differences between Max and Ry. Max is a seriously chillaxed baby, but one thing that Rylan has on him is, what I call, he's an "easy transfer". If he falls asleep in the car, I can get him into the house for a good nap *most of the time*. Even now, at almost 3, I carry that extra extra tall toddler in and get him cozy for a good snooze. Max....not so much. Even when he was an infant, I'd tiptoe into the house carrying his carseat, gently place him on the floor, look down, only to see his big eyes staring at me. At first you hope for both kids to nap at the same time, so you can nap or have some peace, but I've come to enjoy our afternoons where its just me and him. With the second, you get so little one on one time.

At first Max crawls around looking for Rylan and tries to break into his room to get to him, but then there is a moment when he realizes he has free reign of all toys. And he quits looking for Rylan and goes to town!

Here's some pics of such a day in our life. I must go now, part of our refreshing restart is getting my booty in shape.

I didn't get up at 5am

I had that whole intention. I also had the intention of starting my 545am workout regimen. I have crap for will power. I do. I admit it.

The truth is, our little dog and pony show has had a tough summer (year? year and a half?). And I know my my Bleaders (blog readers) are as tired of reading about our latest insect infestation/crazy illness/asthma flareup/ear infection as much as we are tired of living it. It'll get better, I know it will. Just feeling a tiny bit impatient on that one.

Howeva.......

Me and Rob? Got some cute kids. Like real cute. Here's a update on that business.

This baby????

Why, this baby is 11 months old. How did that freakin happen? He was born yesterday, I swears. I'm totally in love with this kid, he's the happiest kid on the planet. Except when you aren't holding him. But then don't sit down to hold him, cause that's super boring and he must get down. He has a LITTLE problem with biting, for which we are doing the totally correct thing that I'm sure we should write a book about: putting a pacey in his mouth. The way I see it, he's biting because his shark mouth has 8 teeth and more on the way and he doesn't understand that my fat thighs are not teethers. He isn't going to kindergarten with a pacey. I hope not anyway. And if its still a problem, I'll just homeschool. I have it all planned.

He has said his first word: LOLA. The two of them have a love like no other. Lola tolerates him pulling at her ears and crawling on her, in return she gets lots of yummies dropped in her general direction from his high chair.

He is a lover of all things meat. Its like he's on a self imposed South Beach diet. Well, if bananas and cheerios were allowed on SBD.

He is definitely sleeping better. And Rob and I grew some guts and have let him cry it out and go to sleep on his own. Some nights now, he almost seems thankful to be put in his crib, flops on his belly and is out, other nights, he tells us in baby talk that we are the worst parents on earth and he'd like to phone a friend (or Grammy). He's on about an 8pm to 6am sleep shift, and this I cannot judge.

I learned with Rylan to slow down and enjoy the ride. Enjoy them as babies, you don't get it back. Well, Max doesn't want to be a baby. He wants to hang with Rylan. He ate baby food for maybe 5 minutes, he crawled at 6 months, he'll be walking within the month, and now he stands up in the middle of the bathtub "look ma, no hands."

This big boy?????

Is 99.9% potty trained. And you'd never know he was adverse to the idea of peeing in the potty a day in his life. And that e-book I followed to do the super crazy 3 day training? She kind of knows what she's doing. I'm not saying its for everybody or even normal at all. It just worked for us. It was more like 5 days, and I changed some of the rules. But, the end result was that he's potty trained, he now tells me when he's got to go and we've used a million and a half public potties with success.

And sure, he did pee at Whole Foods next to the play area. And we did stick a diaper on him before driving 3.5 hours to see my parents. And I put a pull up on him to go to a play date cause he'd had some, um grossness the night before and I'd rather take a step back in potty training than clean grossness off of someone's furniture. But, I am soooooo proud of that kid.

We've been trialing him off of dairy for the summer with some luck. He's always had some stomach issues. I finally talked to one of the GI docs I work with and he gave me a list of symptoms that kids with dairy intolerance have. They include bumpy skin on the cheeks, arms and legs, lots of ear infections at an early age, asthma, and diaper grossness. Rylan got a checkmark next to every thing on the list. His, bathroom issues are sooo much better, and most of the other issues are too (minus the asthma one).

That's them in a nutshell.

Wanted: blogger that keeps up with her blog!

Before you see a tumbleweed blow across my blog, I'll get right on updating it. Not exactly immediately or anything, I'm just updating you all that I'll soon be updating you more.

1. Potty training takes longer than 3 days. Just sayin'. And doing it the fast way can wear a sister out!

2. A week after Max got the Herpely Derpelies, Rylan got the Herpely Derpelies. He would grab his throat and say his tummy hurt. It would have been funny if it was so pitiful. Sadness abounded. Babies needed mama rocking them.

3. My mom came to visit us. Read: save my sanity. The boys both had asthma flareups and Max had an ear infection/clogged ear tube followed by a week of potty training in which poor Max got the Herps, then Rylan got the Herps equalled yet another month gone by with us mostly stuck in the house. Thank you mama, I'll gladly throw blogging out the window to hang with you.

4. We went to visit my parents. As if we hadn't shoved our insane/insect infested/herps having mugs in my mom's face enough, we took our crazy show on the road and went to Mountain Home for the weekend. Ahhhhhh fishing for Rob, sleeping in for me, long talks with mom and sister. We unlabored for Labor Day.

I have a new goal to get up at 5am and blog/clean my house while everyone else is still asleep***. You'll be reading the fruits of that labor soon and very soon.

***I am aware that it is super sad I have to get up at 5am to be up before my kids who are 2.75 and 11 months old. This is why anyone who complains about their kid getting up early at 7:30am gets a face from me that requires at least 3 chins. 7:30 is a dream. A fantasy. I wish I was you!!!!

An Update, a Review, and More Illness

So, potty training has kind of been a pain in my arse ever since I started thinking about it. I have friends (more adequatenses) that thrive on their child being the first to do anything. They happily post on Facebook that their 16 month old just peed on the potty. There are others that I've watched make a yearlong battle out of the potty training and others (namely one in that crazy playgroup that I got kicked out of) that finally potty trained her kid at the age of 5. Its just such a crapshoot (no pun intended) on what you should do, how you should do it, and when your child is ready. I promised myself I would wait till Rylan was ready. I took a few "readiness" quizzes so that I knew the signs. I was patient. I dutifully bought my 41 inch two year old diaper after diaper after diaper. Having two kids in diapers, I chased diaper deals all over the this town, and had 3 friends and family members saving me coupons in the process. And I watched as 2 1/4 years old went by, I stayed patient. He turned 2 1/2, I saw signs he was ready, so we bought a book on how to train a boy. It was all about taking lots of time, doing it for an hour a day, not freaking out, being totally okay as time after time after time no pee goes in the potty and lots of pee goes on the floor.

Rybearski is now 2 3/4 years old and he no longer fits in several brands of size 6 (the largest size) diapers and he had started bringing me new diapers when he was wet. If he couldn't find a diaper, he'd bring a pair of pants. Unaware that is 190 degrees outside, these pants were not always shorts, sometimes he'd bring corduroy pants, sometimes jogging pants, one time the bottoms to a football uniform. Obviously, he now minded being wet. But, the laid back, take your time approach wasn't working for us.

1. I'm pretty sure the book is written by someone smoking marijuana. You cannot be THAT laid back about potty training. I'm pretty laid back and did my best, by come on......

2. I think our next step in diapers was a size small Depends and I just don't think that beats more rigorous potty training on any level.

3. Max is now a mover and a shaker and having pee spots on the floor doesn't mix with crawling toddler.

I had heard of the approach Potty Training in Just 3 Days, and I thought it was insane. You know, back when I had a child that wasn't ready to potty train. Several months, a billion diapers, and a baby crawling through pee spots later, I started thinking it was genious. I needed have a period of time, where I could get Rob to take Max, and Rylan and I could go 90-nothing potty training.

I won't bore you with all the details, but the weekend starts with throwing away all the diapers, going underwear only and flooding them with liquids. You then are supposed to watch them for signs that they have to go and run them (sometimes while they are peeing all over themselves, you and your house) to the bathroom, thus teaching them when "they gotta go." Then you say "tell mommy when you have to go pee pee" a million times a day. Guess how many times Rylan told us he had to go. 3. Every time he was put in bed or time out. Guess how many times he had to actually pee? A 1.7 million. Approximately. I tried, to the best of my ability, to follow the program to a T. It worked about 70 %. Rylan isn't scared to go potty. He has kept a dry bed every night and even woke up last night to go potty at 3am. I feel like it was a success in the sense that we got a really good start, learned all about the potty and how its not the Antichrist, and he got the start on feeling when he's got to go.

Last pic with a diaper on. He felt the need for a backpack and one of his old paceys as well.

Nothing says Potty Party/Boot Camp/Training like a cocker with a hat on. Oh, and Lola, your potty party is coming. Like, you keep up your antics and you'll be partying OUTSIDE. (Please note the towel lined hallway and Elmo with big boy underwear on. Both were big needs for a Potty Party)

Very excited about his plethora of Buzz, Woody, Nemo, Cars, Scooby Do, and Spiderman underwear

This pic was taken before Rylan really grasped what Potty Party meant. He kept saying Happy Birthday, Mommy to me. He got the hint after the 80th time to the Potty. And off came the hat and that smile.

Howeva, this whole "tell mommy when you need to pee"? Its going out the window. Its for the birds. I've got a boy that likes to tumble and play and read books and watch movies (moodies). He isn't about to stop and randomly say "mommy I've got to go potty." No amount of prompting or making him help me clean up his accidents is going to make him slow down at this juncture. I figured out that you have to learn what's best for your child and what works for your child. You know what works best for Rylan? "Let's go potty, mommy's gonna go first!!!!!" You've never seen a kid hightail it to the bathroom faster to beat his mom to pee. I love it. Not sure if its enough to write a book about or make my millions on, but, it has led to a visible lift in stress at our house. Today, as of 5pm, he's had a whole bunch of hits and only 2 misses. Yay Rylan!

As for illness.........someone in our house is sick again. Like, really sick. Like 104 fever sick. I'll give you a hint. It rhymes with snacks. Poor Max. He had a slight fever and sadness over the weekend, that we assumed was his shark mouth growing more teeth. Monday night he sprung 104 fever. I took him to the doc and he has a mouth full of ulcers and sores. Its similar to Hand Foot and Mouth Disease, its called Herpeangina. Bad name, terrible really. Because, the doctor assured me it isn't herpes like you get on your lips or down there.

A couple of weeks ago, when they both had their asthma exacerbation, Rylan complained of throat pain. I'm praying he had a slight case of this and we didn't know it and he isn't going to get this 104 fever business. He's already had a horrible wretched virus or 20 in his young life.

Almost as sad as Max? I keep quoting Dane Cook's comedy set and saying that Max has the Herpily Derpilies.

Here is cute, sick stuff trying out his new, big boy car seat. In actuality, he should have probably had this sucker weeks ago, but we were so poor from buying diapers by the dozens, we had to wait for potty boot camp.

Look at him, he's saying "mom, quit saying I have the herpily derpelies and put me in a luke warm bath!"

Update on Pee on Floor 2011

3 Day potty boot camp is still in progress. Today is the final day of the actual 'stay in the house, flood them with liquids and follow them around for signs that they are about to leak' day. And, its not going awful. Or awesome. But it is going and we are seeing marked improvement. But, seriously, I. Must. Leave. This. House. Soon. I haven't even stepped outside. And I'm pretty sure we should burn our bathroom floor.

New recipe on that other blog

Potty Party/Potty Boot Camp/3 Day Potty Training

Whatever the name, it starts today. We've got a potty chart. We've got dum dums and gummy worms for each successful potty. We've got a a Bissell spot cleaner for the unsuccessful potties. We've got zone defense-I've got Rylan, Rob has Max. We have lots and lots and lots of activities (movies, coloring, playdough, stamping, car racing, pancake making, block building, and painting) to make it fun. We've got tons of fun food (Teddy Grahams, popcorn, pizza, corndogs, muffins, pancakes, hot dogs) to make it delicious and carb loaded. I have a bottle of wine, just in case.

According to the e-book I read, and a few friends that have tried it, if I stick to the program to a T, Rylan will be potty trained by Monday night. I'll be back Monday to update. Pray for us. And our carpet.

He can do it, I know he can